Survivors of the Z’s- Teddy Baker, Billington, outside London
My eyes were blackened by my palms. I held them there. Thinking to myself.
Am I going to do this? Am I actually going to do this?
It was black outside. The night made it that way. No more daytime. Just like me. I was about to do something that I wouldn’t be able to look back on. No turning back.
Whatever you wanted to call it. I was that to you, but to me, no way. No way was I going to let her take away my children
No way was that going to happen
I kept an eye out and then suddenly. It was go time. I breathed in my psychotic air and let it fuel me
Raced me to the finish line of this dearing mission I had set myself on.
“You’ve had it coming,” I said
I opened the car door and made my way up the driveway. To seek what was mine.
It was a quick walk. The stars shone like they were all gazing. Usually the opposite. Usually us humans gaze at them, but that night they gazed my way. All wanting to know what I had install for them. Things were about to get interesting that’s for sure.
“Oh Julie, my sweet dear old Julie, you were a good wife, a good mum, but you’ve stepped over the line”
I was at the door to her mother’s. A nice house in the country. A nice house that overlooked a lovely- lush- field.
Out of the way
Just the way I liked it. It had taken me along time to get there, so all of this wasn’t going to be for nothing. All of this, it was going to come to something. If it had to be me standing and her
Then so be it. I wanted my kids. I wanted my little princess and prince to be with me. At my side, with nobody else telling me what to do. The world was going to shit anyway, so if that meant me showing my true colours to the world. Showing them what I’d do to get what I want.
Then so be it…
“It’s go time,” I said
And saw a silhouette come toward the door after a few knocks later. My blood boiled and my temperature soared. I was ready. Ready to grab what was mine.
No ours anymore, no our children, no nothing. The body opened the door. It was her mum and her face said it all.
“What do you want?” She asked
“Who is it mum?” My ex said
Hearing her voice didn’t bring love anymore. It brought…
“That nutter of an ex- husband of yours”
“I’m still her husband,” I told
“Not to me you ain’t, now get off my fucking property”
My ex came to the door. Wide eyed, anger. She despised me. We despised each other.
“Go back to the kids Julie, I’ve got this”
“Leave it mum, I’ll talk to him,” she said, she looked at her and tapped her on the shoulder, “mum, please”
Her mum slowly
Walked away but was still facing forward. I could feel her stare grabbing a hold of me. But, my cold heart put out the flame inside. Her stare didn’t bother me. I was there for one reason and one reason only.
“What do you want?” She asked
“Your mum’s already asked me that”
“Did you answer her?”
“You know what I’m here for”
“You leave the kids alone, I’m fucking warning you”
“Or what, Julie? You’ll throw a plate at me, try and stab me with one of your mum’s kitchen knives?”
“I wouldn’t have to do that if you didn’t try and bash my fucking face in every night”
“We had some fun times didn’t we?” I asked
“Yeah, I really enjoyed having my face kicked in”
“If it was that bad, then why didn’t you leave sooner?” I asked
“Because I was scared at what you would’ve done”
“Your right, you should be”
“I’m not scared anymore”
“Yes you’re, I can feel it”
She took a step back and shook her head rapidly. A tear from her fearful mind dribbled out. Streamed down her and after, a waterfall appeared.
There was no crying out. No screaming. She was fighting the fear.
“Leave… now” she told
A familiar loved voice made itself known to my ears. It was a bright light to the ever- so- growing- darkness.
“Mummy,” she said
I looked at her. My daughter. My… my little princess was right in front of me. My smile was wide as I laid my eyes on her.
Julie looked my way and shook her head again, “don’t you dare”
“You can’t stop me,” I said
“I will stop you”
I took one step in. One step toward my little angel. One step toward getting a hug I treasured most. She stood in the way. The fear and hatred she felt toward me could now be felt even more.
“Hello my little princess,” I said
But she didn’t come to me. She didn’t even show love. She took a step back. A step back?
From her father
She looked scared.
“Lianne, come give your daddy a hug,” I said
“Get out,” Julie told
Her breathing was strong.
“Get out now”
“What have you done to my daughter,” I said
It was a stare off. A game that both parties weren’t prepared to back down.
“You didn’t think she’d pick up on what an abusive prick you’ve been?”
“What have you told her?” I demanded
She didn’t say anything. My blood and heart were racing. Anger flooded the words I spoke.
“You’re going to regret this,” I said
“I doubt it”
I grabbed her. Her throat was now in the palm of my hand. I crushed it. Felt the struggle. Fed off it. She tried to fight me off.
But I wouldn’t let go.
“Mummy!” Lianne bellowed