Graham Jackson Season 3 Episode Two 

​Survivors of the Z’s- Graham Jackson, Nottingham, UK

I checked up on Preston that night. I thought he could be doing with a solid shoulder to maybe pour some of his thoughts onto. I walked passed the girls room and into his and saw him staring out of the window at the night. He was quiet. After all the time of knowing him. This was different. It was strange to see because he always seemed so, well… mischievous

Happy

   “Hey, kid”

I wanted a reaction. He didn’t like being called kid. I felt like I could maybe crack the ice before entering, but it didn’t work. He didn’t answer me, so I just let myself in and walked to his bed and sat down. He had his back turned to me staring out of the window.

   “It’s been months, I think we might be ok at some point, maybe we could take the dogs out for a walk together if you want?”

I waited for an answer, but again, I didn’t get any. All I got was the words of nothing and the wind outside. Still though. I waited for the boy to talk and I was going to wait for as long as it took

And 

I knew 

It was going to take some time

   “I felt like shit the other day, I have a lot of regrets in my life, being a wrinkly old man that is, sometimes I think back to my wrongs and”-

   “I don’t need a pep talk,” he told

   “Then what do you need, you should know I’m here for you, I will always be here for you”

   “Why?” He asked

   “What do you mean, why?” 

   “Why do you care for me so much?” He said, “I mean, I’m not your son, I’m not family or anything, why do you care for me?”

   “Hold on just a second, Preston,” I said, “What ever it is you’re feeling, it isn’t real, what ever triggered this about me, I will tell you this,” I put my hand on his shoulder, he still had his back turned to me, he still stared into the night, “you’re like the son I never had, do you understand? I’ve always wanted a son to protect my daughter if anything happened to me, but that never came true for me until now, ok, you aren’t my biological son, you was never born into my family, but that doesn’t stop me from loving you at all, you’re here with me, understand? You’re here… with me… with us”

It went quiet again and I didn’t say anything for awhile. I just let what I said sink in to his mind. I wanted him to know how important he was to me

TO US

To me and the rest of the family

He was something that I needed. 

HELL

He was the one thing I needed. I wanted a future man to grow strong and protect my granddaughters if anything happened to myself or Evelyn.

He was the key to a future without myself and my angel.

   “Think about what I said,” I spoke, “What I said was real, not fake, these were true feelings coming from my heart, everything I said… I meant, but only you can determine what I truly meant to you”

I got up and walked towards the door. I didn’t want to leave him in such a way, but I felt like I had to. I felt like I had to let him think things through. He knew who he was. Who knew where he was, but he didn’t know who was around him and how much we cared for him. 

I reached the door 

   “Graham,” he spoke, like a whisper

   I had my back turned, but I turned to face him, “you wanna talk about it?”

   He nodded, “ok”

   “Good, I respect that”

   “Just shut up and listen,” he told

   I put my hands up, “Ok ok, go on shoot”

   “I was adopted when I was nine,” he explained, “my mum and dad gave me up because I was a big problem to them, always getting into trouble, in an out of schools, I didn’t last long in any of them, I was a little stupid shit, those were my dad’s words, he hated me, they both did, I was a horrible son to them and in the end they just gave me up, unlike my brother who loved me more than anything, he was always there for me, whenever I needed anything he was there by my side to talk to me and give me what I needed, whether it’ll he money or a birthday present, he was there…” he stopped and sadness seeped out, “my mum and dad hated him also, he was like me in a way, but he left home when he was Eighteen, so it was rare that I saw him, they hated him coming round, so he stopped coming round and I had to go to him, he was trouble, my mum and dad always said, but I’ll never see him again anyway”

   “Why?” I asked

   “Last thing I heard, he had died in a car accident”

   “I’m sorry about that”

   “It’s ok, I still see him from time to time”

   “In your dreams?” I asked

   “Kinda, I mean he’s not real or anything, but I see him hanging around here”

I frowned 

   “What does he look like?”

   “Slim, kinda bold, pale, crazy looking, but they always say, never judge a book by its cover”

   “Strange,” I said

   “What is?”

   “I saw the exact same guy hanging around too”

   “Did he look like what I just said?”

   “Yes… yes he did”

   “So he’s not dead?” He asked, a smile glistened 

   “If its him… I guess not…”

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