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We Live, We Die, We LIVE
What do you guys think of our site? We’d like to hear your thoughts, comment below peeps
What would you like to see?
Who is your favourite character(s)?
What is your favourite episode?
LET US KNOW!
Survivors of the Z’s- Graham Jackson, Nottingham, UK
Each punch collided with a sickening blow and after each punch I felt breaking bones. I could hear nothing around me. All I could see was the man’s face getting bloodier and bloodier.
I had lost it
Nothing but rage raining down
I breathed and looked upon what I had done.
“Shit,” I said
Everything theb came back into focus
And it was all bloody
The man was still breathing but he was only an inch away from deaths door. It was slowly opening and I was the man that seemed to have answered it for him. I had dragged him into the other side. The only thing that needed to be done now was the door to be closed and locked behind him.
His eyes were still open
His breathing was still there
He just looked shocked
And the only thing I could do was look at what my fists had created.
A bashed up face with blood for company
“Arrrglllh,” I heard
I couldn’t make it out. He spat blood and blood came out of his nose.
I got up and looked down at him, “I’m sorry”
“Fuck that, don’t apologise, the dickhead deserved it,” Preston told
“This isn’t right, he needs a doctor,”
A voice then shouted. It sounded like it was coming from where he was before.
A young girl
Came out from around the corner and walked up towards us.
“Marcus,” her young voice said, she looked straight at us, her face was innocent with dirt on it, she was skinny, she looked starved and her clothes hung off her, “Marcus!”
Her face changed to panic as she ran towards us and sat down beside him.
“Marcus, what happened?” She asked, “Marcus please”
He pointed at us, “these”
She looked our way
Her face turning to anger with tears shedding. What once was a calm walk had now turned into a
stormy one that I…
There was no need for what I had done. I could’ve just walked away from him, but my dogs are my family. They’re me and I am them and nobody is going to get in the way of that
We stayed there with them. The dogs sat around Preston and I, looking around.
“Look what you did!” She cried
“I’m sorry,” I told
“You think you’ll get away with this, you won’t, not when I tell him, you’ll see!”
“Tell who?” Preston asked
“Just you wait!”
Another voice then shouted from the same place. This time it was a man’s voice.
We had to go
My nerves were going crazy
I had to react and think on my toes and the first thing I thought was to walk away. I nudged Preston and motioned to him.
“Listen, we’re going to go, I’m sorry about what happened, please forgive me”
“You’re a dead man,” Marcus spoke, a bloody mess
“These dogs here are my family, listen, I’m sorry for what I did, I was out of order, but you don’t threaten my family, ever”
The man came around the corner and jogged up towards us. He was taller, slim and pail. He wore a hood like the young girl. They all looked rough.
“Shit, Marcus,” he said
Kara looked our way and pointed, “They did this, Corbin”
He looked at us, sharply, “You wanna explain this?”
I put my hands up, “listen, we’re going to go, again I’m sorry for what I’ve done, this didn’t need to happen”
“Hell it didn’t, this guy is seriously fucked, you annihilated him, what’s your reason for doing this?”
We walked backwards, “I’m not explaining myself again, I’m sure your friend will tell you what happened, we’re going now, again, I’m sorry”
We watched them for awhile until we felt like we could turn on our heals.
“Watch yourselves!” I heard
“I think we could take them?” He told
I shook my head, “no, I’ve done enough, nothing more is going to happen”
I looked behind and watched them disappear in the distance. I felt their stare. Even though they were far away. I could still feel them looking our way.
My dogs walked in front of us. Jesse wandered off and sniffed around in the field. Bruno ran around and Elvis stayed beside me. I looked down for him moments later and he had gone. I looked around and noticed something was up. He had stopped and he was looking at something, but I didn’t know what. It was like he had seen something, but all I saw was the field with the bushes and trees in the distance.
“What’s wrong with him?” Preston asked
“I don’t know”
The feeling of unease had risen a little more. Dogs don’t just stop for no reason.
“Do you think someones following us?” He asked
“Let’s just get home”
I looked behind again and this time I spotted something. A tall figure in the distance just standing there looking over. Elvis then growled and barked
“Elvis, leave,” I told
“That’s one of them isn’t it?” Preston asked
“Let’s go,” I told, “keep moving”
“Keep walking, woooooooh! Walk on home, walk on home old man, hahahaha, woooooooh!”
“Keep going, don’t look, just go,” I told, I saw the dogs turn to go back and I whistled, “come here!” I ordered
They came back. We didn’t stop this time. We aimed for home and quickened the pace, but I felt trouble. I felt a gaze staring into the back of my neck like a target. They had their eyes fixed on us.
“What if they find us?” He questioned, “They’re following us”
“Turn around friend!” I heard
“They want a reaction and we aren’t going to give them one, we’re nearly home, we’ll be safe there”
We reached a path and walked down it. My heart was racing. I was ready for a fight that I didn’t want. This could’ve been avoided.
My eyes widened from what I had suddenly spotted, “Jesus”
Was laid out on the ground in a pool of blood. A message was on the fence in red.
“The world is free,” I read
Survivors of the Z’s- Teddy Baker, Outside Wales, UK
NOT SO LONG BEFORE-
We needed food
We had run dry and it was now time to venture out.
The world had changed and I knew that. Venturing out wasn’t going to be a heavenly drive round the country to a local village shop.
It was going to be bumpy
The sky may have been clear at the moment
A storm wasn’t that far away.
I walked out of the house toward the car. They all followed me. I stopped and dropped to my children’s level.
First Jack, I hugged him tight, “you look after your sister, don’t have Elijah doing anything that he doesn’t need to, he’s our family now, family love each other, understand?”
He nodded, “yes dad”
My little star was next, I hugged her tight, “my lil girl, you have two strong men here to protect you, I won’t be gone long, I’ll be back before you know it, ok”
She nodded and I heard a whimper, “come back to us daddy”
“I will, now give me a kiss”
She kissed me on the cheek and I got up and walked toward Elijah. He was worried and it was written all over his face. He had done so much for me. To have a friend like him was a miracle in this world. I hugged him tight and looked into his eyes.
“Stay strong,” I told, “You’ve been such a great friend, if I’m not”-
“I can go, you don’t have to, I can do it”
“No, I need to get used to this, we’re running low on food and I wanna provide for my family, you… my children… are my family”
“I’m gonna have to pull my weight sooner or later,” he said
I opened the car and turned to face him, “you will, in time, I trust you”
I put the gun, map and knife on the passenger seat and got in the car. I looked back
At my children
At my close friend
Jack stood there with Lianne with his arm around her. Condoling her like a big brother should. Both watching me. All of them with concerned looks on their faces.
I lowered the window, “Elijah”
He came over, “yeah”
I took a deep breath, “watch Jack for me”
“You got it… and Teddy,” he caressed my shoulder, “are you sure about this?”
“I have to do this,” I told, “I’ll see you soon”
I drove away and looked in the mirror as my family disappeared into the distance. I drove and thought about plenty of things as the vast fields around me came visible as the drive expanded. The country side was beautiful. The place held many positives in the time I had now found myself in. I looked at the dashboard and found a CD.
“Hmm, what have you got for me,” I said
I put it in and a man’s voice began to speak. The voice sounded emotional. All I could hear were breaths and then…
The words came
“My sweet Carrie, saying your name at a time like this will always make the sky bright even when it’s dark, like it is now. I tried to see reason, I tried see things differently but I couldn’t, I don’t love her anymore, I love you, first time I saw you in that bar in London I couldn’t take my eyes off you, even when I was with her all I could see was you. I knew you were married because you were with your husband at the time. That black sparkly dress, that long hair that fell down your back. He was such a lucky guy and I wanted that, it’s just so unfortunate how things planned out for us, I know you were married and I am and it wouldn’t have been the best of things for our families, but just imagine if we met before hand, just… imagine, imagine how happy we both would’ve been. Anyway, if this ever gets to you, that’s if I ever get bigger balls, I hope we can see each other again because I can’t keep thinking about you, anyway, I hope you’re well, take care”
I looked to the left and noticed a large house. I stopped and focused on it.
Was there anything in there?
Was it empty?
I got out and walked over.
Opened the big gate
Walked down the vast garden whilst looking around cautiously.
My back was straight
My focus was hard
This house could hold something that we really needed… so I hoped. I got close and listened for any movement. Any noises that sounded unusual.
So I hoped
I opened the door quietly and slowly made my way in. It was a pretty big house. The corridor was vast
With rooms on either side with a few pictures on the walls here and there, most- probably- family members
I closed my eyes
Took a deep breath
And moved forward
I walked through and checked every room for any infected. I grasped my knife on one side and touched my gun on the other. I reassured myself that I was going to get through this. I had survived this long in a screwed up world so I was going to survive this little test.
My breath was light as my gaze switched from left to right.
Noticed a room
“Wow,” I muttered, “should’ve picked this place”
My heart then jumped out of my mouth as a large bang came from upstairs and a scream
A childs scream
“Leave me alone!!!”
I took out the gun and kept my blood stained knife in its holster. I looked upstairs and made my way up.
“Hello!” I said
An infected male came zooming toward me.
my guard was up and I smiled, “come at me”
I shot and It’s head splattered. It fell heavily on the ground and that was that.
“Hello,” I said, “anybody there, I heard a scream”
“Go away,” I heard, it was a girls voice
I walked to where I thought her voice was coming from.
The door was open
A bedroom was inside
I walked in slowly and saw her sitting down at the corner of the room holding her arm.
A gun was beside her
“I can help you,” I said
“No you can’t, no one can”
I would say
Was in her early teens.
I walked closer with my hands up to assure her I was good and I didn’t want to cause her any harm
She picked the gun up and pointed it at me, “Don’t come any closer,” she demanded
I noticed blood on her arm. It was a bite. A large one. I saw her wince in pain. Tears ran down but she didn’t cry.
“Please, I’m not here for this, I wanna help you”
It went quiet for a short time. Just her and I keeping eye contact. The longer I stared into the young girls eyes the more of her story was revealed.
She was alone
And she had been alone for awhile
The pain I felt in those eyes. It felt like it had taken her.
She pointed the gun to the side of her head, “no… you can’t”
The gun went off and the blood splattered from the other side. I stared at the gun at the dead body of the young girl. I didn’t know her name. I didn’t know anything about her. The only thing I knew were her last moments of suffering.
Looked one final time
Brushed myself off
And got back to my mission
Survivors of the Z’s- Rhonda Gedling, somewhere in Colorado
My sight wasn’t blurry anymore and the shouts and shots weren’t muffled
The noises were more
Absolute silence and then a roar of cheers. Including Murphy’s which was the most robust. He also started the cheer and the pumps of the chests.
Even though I couldn’t see them, I had a feeling thats what they’d be doing. They had won a battle that I couldn’t see, but my mom did.
“Long live us!” He shouted, “welcome home peeps!”
The feeling I had in my gut was not right one bit. I tried to examine what I could’ve done to avoid this mess that we had found ourselves in. How did this all come to be? Should we have just carried on instead of stopping right there and then?
We were tired
It was just the case of us being at the wrong place at the wrong frigging time. He came back into the RV. His face all smiles. It had been a good day for the monster.
“Looks like we have a good future here,” he said, “nothing to stop us, nothing to get in our way, other than those crazy motherfuckers we’ve just disposed of”
I looked at him, “You gonna make me stay?”
“You can leave if you want, but deep deep down inside…” he came in close, “I know you’ll miss me”
My blood boiled so bad. Right there and then I wanted to kill him. The frustrating thing was.
I couldn’t. I wasn’t the stupid bitch that I knew he thought I was. I needed a plan. I need something that was going to keep me alive, because I knew full well that one wrong move that he didn’t agree with.
It’ll be lights out
No more walking on the dead ground. Just me floating in the darkness
“I doubt I’ll miss you,” I said, “if anything happens to you, I hope to be the one that does it”
“Bless ya, bless ya very much, I hope that we can be friends, because I’m a good friend to have, being a friend to a dangerous man can be very helpful in the long haul”
“Like the fucking idiots out there that you have hanging off your balls, I’ll not let you fool me into thinking you’re a saint”
He flashed his eyebrows and licked his lips.
“Hmm, you’re a hard gal to please,” he told, “man offers a bitch a safe haven and she turns it down”
“What you did to me, what you did to us, you will regret it”
He smiled once again, “I love a challenge, I love living dangerously and by the way, you look great when you’re mad”
I started to rise to my feet and I stumbled. He got up and the same fucking simper had grew even bigger. He watched me and then decided to be a gentleman by offering his hand.
“Don’t you fucking touch me”
“Don’t flatter yourself, I was offering a hand, but if you’re gonna be all hormonal about it, then you can struggle”
He took a step back and as I got my balance, he then clapped his hands together with the same damn smile.
“Rhonda!” I heard
“She’s in here, she’s fine,” Murphy told
Mom came storming in, in a bloody mess.
Her eyes widened
All over the place
She was concerned and shocked at the same time. She panted wildly as she looked my way.
“Rhonda… are you… are you ok?” She asked
“She’s fine,” Murphy spoke, “Just a little dizzy from the hit,” he stepped outside, “I’ll leave you two gals time to catch up”
He closed the door and we were both alone with muffled voices coming from the outside.
“Am I ok?” I asked, “What the fuck do you think?” I pointed to the blood around my mouth, “do I look ok?”
“I’m sorry, I should’ve done something, I”-
I sighed, “leave it, it doesn’t matter, the chance we get, we’re getting out of here”
“Are you sure?” She asked
“What do you mean…? This is not the place for us, it’s not, we have to go, these people, what they’ve done to us…” anger boiled inside, emotions making my stomach like hell’s sauna, “we have to go… we have to”
She was silent. I couldn’t understand
Why couldn’t she find the words to carry on the plans of escape? Why was she fucking struggling to see what I was seeing? This wasn’t like her at all. As much as I despised the woman. She wasn’t the kind of woman to get scared easily in the time we had rekindled.
“I’m sorry, but out there, we don’t stand a chance on our own”
And there it was.
Dropped on my head
Making me wonder if we were ever going to get away.
I couldn’t leave her there. That wasnt going to happen.
“I don’t believe this,” I said, “so this is it huh, welcome to hell, welcome to a life where men decide to put their hands on us when ever they feel like it and if we even fight back, I don’t think that vile prick out there will let it stand this time…” I got in close, “we’ll be dead, don’t you get it…? Is that the life you wanna lead”
He let us have our moment together until he knocked on the door.
“Knock knock knock, somebody wants to meet ya”
“Where’re my fellow ladies,” I heard
“In here my queen”
The door opened and he walked in once again, but this time he had company.
“Ladies, this is my wife, Heidi”
The first thing I noticed was her prison uniform. She was a strong looking woman.
Just a little shorter than Murphy. Her eyes made contact and when they did they grabbed you from the inside. Her hair was short and platinum. Her cheekbones were well made which matched the rest of her slim built body. She was tough. I felt it and so did mom.
She extended her arms, “my fellow women, my fellow lionesses, welcome to your new home”
“We aren’t staying,” I told
She wasn’t smiling for long, her smile died and her face became darkened and then she shrugged, she didn’t give a shit “ok, you can leave, just like my sexy hubby over here said,” she grabbed his crotch and he smiled, “you won’t stand a dickedy chance out there by yourself, plus look at you, you aren’t strong enough, your best bet is to stay with us”
“Try me,” I told
Mom put her hand on my arm and clenched hard. I wasn’t in the best of positions to fight but I wasn’t going to take any crap.
“Ladies, ladies, ladies,” Murphy spoke, “like my smoking hot wife said,” he grabbed her behind and she grinned, “you won’t stand a chance, so make your choice…”
Survivors of the Z’s- Cal Moore, Ashford City, California
Day had sprung
The suns light spread once again in blinding fashion
Sleep didn’t come easy
I sat on the rooftop and looked down. Looked down at the dead city. What once was night and I could see nothing but pitch black.
I could see my deceased home once again and this time I could see a lot more. The view I had was breathtaking in a horrible way. The kind of way where the longer you stared, the horrible it got. I was on my own up there. Mason was around somewhere whilst my parents worried about other things. They were always in the soldiers ears. Trying to get the information they wanted
They didn’t know anything
We felt it to be strange,
We knew something was being hidden from us, but there was nothing else we could’ve done. It was either to die out there or MAYBE
Survive in there and that was that.
I gazed longer at the skyline in the distance. Tall buildings stood above everything else. The road below them is where Mason and I used to hang around. The mall was just a few blocks away. I looked down at the large garden below at my Dad and Ray talking to one of the soldiers. Ray being the big man he was. Towered over them both. I couldn’t make out what they were saying, so I focused on somewhere else.
“Hey,” I heard, I looked around and it was my mom, “you ok up here by yourself?”
“Yeah, I’m fine”
She sat down with me, “You seen Mason?”
“He’s meditating with Israel”
She got up and walked to where we could see the back yard, “look”
I walked over and spotted him with Israel. Just like she said. They both sat on the grass with their legs crossed and eyes closed. I grinned at the sight. It was strange at first to see, but then my Mom made me realise something.
“He’s lost so much,” she reminded, “he needs peice of mind, to calm, I do it now and again to remind myself to be thankful for what I have, I worry about you and your father a lot, back then and especially now, but we’re all still here for each other…” She paused and looked over at him, “it seems like he’s helping him to ease that pain, you should join in, it’s good, trust me it’ll help”
“I don’t need to,” I told
“We all do, if there’s a time to find something positive, nows the time, think about it”
She walked away and climbed back down inside the house.
Talking to Mom was different of course. Looking into her eyes whilst talking to her gave off a different feeling. Her looked spent. Her eyes were darker.
Like the light
Was slowly dying
My dad was the same
I couldn’t help but think about the worst possible things. I couldn’t help but think that my parents were next.
Was it only a matter of time?
Was the world only meant for darkness now?
I clinched my eyes shut
Breathed deeply and opened them again. I looked over at Mason and Israel and started to make my way over.
“Can I join?” I asked
Israel opened one eye and nodded, “sit, shut your eyes and breathe”
I looked over at Mason. He was oblivious.
I sat and did what he said.
“Let your thoughts wash over you,” he told, “let there be silence in your mind”
I let it all take over me
The deep breaths
The darkness from my closed eyes
It suddenly felt like I was floating in the air with nobody else around me.
Nothing but my thoughts
A picture suddenly came in front of me like a film was being played. This wasn’t silence. This was the opposite.
It was like a tidle wave of negitveness had begun to drown me. A big fear of mine. Now on top of me. Squashing me like a stampede. My breathing was a panic.
“No,” I said
Everybody was dead in front of my eyes. We were in the same place and somehow they were all dead.
I opened them, “I can’t do this”
I got up and quickly walked away.
The sun set once more. I sat on a bench in the back garden and heard the bushes and trees nestle in the wind. My dad’s figure came from the side of the house and walked toward me.
He sat down beside me and put his arm at the back of the chair, “I haven’t spoke to you much, I’m sorry”
“Sorry for what?” I asked
“I haven’t been there for you, a father should be there for his son and I haven’t been, I’m sorry for that, I’ve just been in my own little world, I’ve been selfish and I’m not going to be from now on”
“You don’t need to be sorry for that, dad, you don’t, believe me when I say this”-
“Shhh, can you hear that?”
We listened and heard something walking around outside.
“Is it one of them?” I asked
“We’ll go get one of the guys,” he told
We stood up and quickly walked to the house.
Through the coridoor
And into the living room where most of them were. A few of the soldiers were still outside.
I looked at mom and the others. They looked petrified.
The main man held a note, “What’s that?” Dad asked
He gave it to my dad and it was a note written what looked like blood.
DEATH WILL COME
Survivors of the Z’s- Graham Jackson, Nottingham, UK
I walked down with the three of them and by my side was also Preston. It was around 7 in the morning and the son was bright like it had just been born. The air was fresh and the roads and pavements were empty. It was great getting out of the house with the thoughts flying around. It was nothing but a burden and Preston deffinately needed the walk
I promised him
“Yeah,” he nodded, “beats being stuck in doors and going crazy”
“Damn right,” I said
“Do you think we’re safe walking around?” He asked, “not like I’m scared or anything”
I turned and bent down to his level, “Hey, look at me,” I said, “I’ll never put any of you in danger, never, we’re safe, it’s light, there’s soldiers, a hell of a lot of them patrolling, its safe out here, we’re ok”
He nodded as he looked into my eyes. He was frightened and I could see that and so was I, but I didn’t want to show that of course
I had to be strong
For all of us
“I believe you,” he told
“Come on, let’s just enjoy the walk”
We stuck to familiar places. We stayed to where we knew. The local parks and roads. We didn’t want to walk far because there was always that sense of danger and if anything happened we’d wanna get back as soon as possible.
“Sometimes I wonder what would’ve happened to me if I didn’t find you,” he mentioned
“But you did and thats all that matters”
He jumped on a low wall and began walking on it. He held his arms out whilst he walked. Trying to keep his balance.
“I know, but sometimes I think what if I didn’t, I mean, that would’ve been some scary fucking shit”
“Yes it would,” I said, “yes it would”
“I would’ve been alright,” he said, “I’ve had to deal with a lot of crap in my life”
“I believe you,” I told, “you’re a strong kid, older than you actually are, I know if you were out there alone… you would’ve been ok”
I laughed, “you have a lot of confidence I’ll give you that”
“Somebody has to,” he turned and winked
The houses we passed. Most of them were abandoned. The windows were shot up and there were blood splatters on the walls. Large black X’s were painted on the front of the houses with red tape blocking the way to get into the gardens.
“It’s still here,” he murmered, “will it ever go”
“I don’t know,” I answered, “sorry Preston, but that’s all I have”
A few soldiers and people with white biohazard suits walked out from one of the homes. I got a peep into the house as the soldiers kept an eye on me. What I saw was gruesome.
Two dead bodies
One was torn to bits
The other wasn’t
Both lying next to each other
“Can you see anything?” He asked
“Move along please,” a woman soldier told, “move along”
I put my hands up to gesture I was going, “ok”
We both moved along and the dogs followed. All three walked in front sniffing around in different areas. We hadn’t seen many people walking around and if we did they would’ve probably have been homeless or just looked completely out of it
The city may have been protected by the army and under strict rules, but it didn’t stop people from giving up. Fear was huge and it wasn’t budging. It didn’t matter how many soldiers there were. People still didn’t feel safe and I could feel that and I understood it. Anything could still happen. More blood could still be spilled in Nottingham and more families
The ones that were left
Could be destroyed by this disease
“I wonder where my brother is, you said you saw him to right?” He asked
“I did,” I answered, “maybe he’s around somewhere”
“I hope so, but what do I say? I haven’t seen him for ages”
“It’ll come to you, don’t worry, he’s your brother”
“I’m just nervous, if he comes again tonight I’ll go talk to him”
“Don’t forget about the curfew, he shouldn’t be out either, which is strange, because he was”
“You do anything for family though right? He was just trying to find me”
“Maybe, and he has found you”
“I’m glad he’s alive, we have so much to catch up on, he’s the best brother anybody could ever have, I wonder what he’s been doing all this time”
“Ask him when you see him”
We had been walking for quite some time. Jesse suddenly growled and the others joined. I looked on in concern and walked over to where their gaze was directed.
I put my arm in front of Preston, “Stay close”
“What the fuck do you want?” I heard
I looked into a car park where an apartement block was. It was in tatters and battered and burnt cars sat there.
“Hey, get these fucking dogs away from me”
A young man was revealed. He looked in a state. He wore his hood up with strands of hair peeping out. He was skinny as fuck. His hands shook and his eyes weren’t looked Ill. He looked out of it. Then I saw the blood on his hands.
“Hey, friend,” he spoke, “get these fucking dogs away from me!”
“Jesse, Elvis, Bruno, come here, now”
They did as they were told and came back. Something wasn’t right with this guy I could tell. The deep feeling stabbed at me and I didn’t want any part of it. We all walked away. I watched our backs and kept an eye out.
“He looked fucked,” Preston said
“Just keep walking,” I told
“Hey, friend!” I heard
I looked around and he followed us from a distance
“How much for the dogs?” He asked, he smiled a perverse smile with blood around his mouth, his blood stained teeth showed, “they would last for days, I’ve never had a doggy meat sandwich before”
I quickly turned and I was suddenly on top of him. Laying in to him like there was no tomorrow…
Survivors of the Z’s- Teddy Baker, Outside Wales, UK
After moments of thinking. Moments of feeling each second tick by. Moments of filtering through every single scene of killing the now- dead- man that was before me. He rested against the tree with his head to the ground.
A twig snapping behind me got my attention.
I looked around, fear avoiding me, “Who’s there?”
She came out from the trees, “So you killed him?” She asked
Her name was Abbey. She was a young woman. Twenty one years of age. The younger sister to the man I had killed. She was small, blonde and kind hearted. Her voice was soft and her eyes were softer. She looked as if she was dismantled from the inside as she looked upon what was in front of her.
Looking at him
I stayed seated, my back turned “You wasn’t there”
“I don’t have to be,” she said
I heard her walking. The leaves rustled when her legs kicked. She then appeared at the corner of my eye, “What did he do to deserve this?”
“He tried to kill me,” I explained
“For one reason, for what you did”
I looked up and stared into her eyes, “Oh really,” I said, “and what did I do?”
“You know what you did, I don’t have to repeat it”
I shook my head and sighed. I stared at her even longer this time, but she wasn’t backing down. She walked over to her brother. With her back facing me now. Something inside of me wanted to get rid of her and now I had to fight between heaven and hell, angel and demon, one on the left and one on the right. Which one will win the battle of words. Do I really need to kill this woman? This young innocent woman that doesn’t look like she has a black bone inside of her. A desire for vengeance doesn’t seek people like her surely?
What if it did?
What if she wanted to take something from me?
An eye for an eye
A tooth for a tooth
For a heart
My loved one because I had killed one of her’s.
My kids that had no part of this. What if she wanted to hurt me through them?
What if she didn’t?
She cried on her brother, hugged him tightly, “maybe you should kill me to,” she said, sadness and anger mixed in, “maybe you should come over hear and cut my fucking neck open”
She stood up and faced me. Her body straight, face stern with tears trickling.
“You know you want to,” she said
She walked up to me. She didn’t need to take her eyes off me. Her eyes gazed into mine with every step she took towards me. Tears flowed once more. She stood there
I looked down at her and I felt it. I felt my cruel self once again trying to climb out
“Maybe I do,” I told, “maybe I don’t, you just haven’t made the wrong move yet”
A hand then pulled back and immediately pelted me in the face.
“Grab your fucking knife!”
Her slap came and then…
I blocked her and pushed her to the ground. She went down and got back up. She looked at the knife in its holster. I had my had on it. She stared at it by my side and she weeped once more.
“You’re not gonna kill me?”
“I killed your brother because he tried to end me, you”-
“Abbey,” I heard
I looked around and saw Eric, a sixteen year old kid, Abbey’s younger brother. He wore a black tracksuit with a black cap.
“Eric, what are you doing here?” She asked
“I was worried, so I followed you”
“Francis,” he looked on at his older brother in the distance and began the same journey of torture like his sister, from shock, to sadness, to indenial, to… broken, “bro…”-
She went up to him and took him in his arms. He bawled on her arm as she took him in tight.
I felt it
I felt it big time
I was starting to question myself and one point, but I didn’t let the question go any further.
I did the right thing…
They both walked to Francis and sat beside him. Eric cried whilst Abbey consoled him.
“All of this because of that moment, for what you did!” She cried, “you should’ve just let it be”
“You know I couldn’t have done that,” I told
“First my uncle and now my brother”
“Your uncle was dangerous, especially to my family”
“He had regretted everything he did, everything! He had changed, we knew it, you didn’t know him! And now… now my brother!”
“They both deserved every fucking thing that I did, every, little, thing, especially your uncle”
“Just because there’s no rules anymore doesn’t give you the right to take away lives”
The saying goes
What goes around comes around
I had killed was nothing but scum. Nothing but a disgusting human being who had destroyed many lives.
You may see me as one of them right now, but I’ll let you in on a little secret, you listening…
I. DON’T. GIVE. A. FUCK
If I did I’d be a fool. A weak man who was too scared to swim in the deep end.
I had to
Do you wanna know why I did?
Stupid question huh
Here’s what happened…?
Survivors of the Z’s- Rhonda Gedling, Hindegate, Colorado
”There’s a lot of them Murphy!” The driver cried
“Just run through the fuckers, if we stop, we’re dead!”
Mom and I sat facing each other on opposite sides of the RV. Our faces showed nothing. It was like we had given up, but we hadn’t. I was still stirring and so was she. Stirring with a plan to get the hell out of there. Each man I looked at I wanted to grab their heads and crush it with my bare hands. I fucking wished.
“Soon girls, you’ll have a place to lye your heads!” He told
The words obviously didn’t touch my heart. His words didn’t mean a damn fucking thing. All I could do was sit there and listen to his shit. I closed my eyes for a short period and felt my finger nails dig into the palms of my hands as I clenched my fists.
“Hey,” I heard, “did you hear me?”
I looked up and saw Murphy looking over. His eyes poison and his mouth grinned.
I nodded, “yes”
“Good, I hope you’re grateful, if not, well, you can always try and make it out there, your decision”
I went to put my shirt on
“No no,” he said, “they are good to look at, it’ll be a shame to hide them”
I looked over at him and put it on anyway, “fuck you”
“There was no need for that, man’s only paying a compliment,” the fat old fucker said
I got up and walked over. Everybody watched especially Murphy and Rock. The fat old bastard stood his ground and stared a hole right through me as I walked toward him. I stood and stared as I reached him. Nobody did anything. Murphy and Rock looked on and so did the others. Including the old fat man. He grinned and then sniggered.
“I like this bitch,” he said, “can we keep her and take her for walks, I promise I’ll look after her daddy”
All I saw was blood and hate. My fists were clenched more than before.
JUST. FUCKING. HIT. HIM.
Do you think I did? Oh I did alright. I hit him fucking hard. I clenched my fist and bang. Right in his fat ugly jaw.
“You like me now you fat old fucking prick!” I screamed, “this bitch just knocked your saggy ass out”
I had dropped him. I had dropped him hard. His fat ass hit off the ground and the back of his head bounced off the floor.
He looked up, spat blood from his mouth, a hell of a lot of it, “gorgeous, being in prison, you learn not to care about pain”
“How about I crush your fucking balls!”
A large hand then wrapped around my neck and slammed me against the wall.
“Sit down girl and chill,” Rock ordered
I looked up at him. His large chest and arms covering a large area. His eyes dark with malice. I felt his grip tighten. I began to feel dizzy.
Mom then got up and Murphy came into play, he pointed his gun at her, “sit your ass down,” he told, she didn’t, “sit down!” She looked at me and I nodded to her, I knew he would, I knew he would pull the trigger, so she had to “Just chill everyone, all of this is unnecessary, fighting doesn’t solve a fucking thing, all it does is complicate things and piss off the people that can change things in an instant, meaning…” he pointed at himself as he held the gun to mom, “me”
“Damn right Murph,” the fat man had risen to his feet
He looked over, angry, “shut up,” he told, “you boys need to stop being pussys, it’s embarrassing”
“She hits hard,” he told
Murphy’s eyes widened, “You wanna feel my punch?” He asked, he faced up to him and the fat man backed off, “I could’ve left you in their to be eaten a fucking live, you’d make a great meal for the dead wouldn’t you, like a ten course fucking meal, show me, show me why I brought you with me”
He walked over to me and Rock moved away.
“If she doesn’t go down from the first, I’ll know how much a damn pussy you’re”
“This is for you bitch,” he said
It came flying at me and like a rock being thrown at point blank. He did he was told. I blacked out and I heard the screams from mom.
“Rhonda!” She cried
I woke up to a blur and gunfire. The RV door was open and I couldn’t see much out of it. I looked to my left slowly. I realised mom wasn’t there and began to panic a little.
“Mom,” I murmered
“Yeah!” I heard, “That’s how you fucking do it!
A figure walked in and it was him once again
I couldn’t see much of him. He kept his distance and turned his back and looked out of the RV.
“You’re awake, I’m glad,” he said, “we’re here by the way, your future home, we just need to clear a few things out and you can come out, I know what you’re thinking, your mom right? Don’t worry about her, she’s one tough son of a bitch, she’s actually helping us, took some convincing, but she’s smart and realised that you can survive in numbers and not in few, we hang with the pack of dogs and we don’t get bit, she realised that and I hope you do to,” he turned and faced me, “sorry about what happened back there, sometimes a leader has to take drastic measures to keep the line straight, I hope you understand”
“I wish I could, because I’m one sexy mother fucker,” he looked out of the door and lifted up his arms, “Hey honey! Told you I’d find you!” He looked around again, came closer and bent down to my level, “thats my wife Heidi, she’s fucking crazy, she was in prison too, but, all crazy are free now, because the whole world has gone caraazy”
He smiled another one of those daunting smiles and laughed once again.
“Murphy!” I heard
“Be right there!” He told, “one sec, I’ll be right back honey,” he told
He got up. Walked back out and closed the door and all I could hear was gone fire once again…
Survivors of the Z’s- Cal Moore, Ashford City, California
WHEN IT ALL HAPPENED-
THE WORLD WE KNOW
LET OUR SINS FALL UPON
That’s what the sign said and all I could do was think about Ellie. We listened to the radio and all they spoke about was the virus that had suddenly risen. Mom switched off the radio and we drived In silence back home. I gave Mason a glance who looked horrified. He stared at the back of the seat then looked at me.
“Did that… did that just happen?” He asked
I nodded, “it was like she was possessed or something”
“Did you see her mom, what the hell”
“I hope she’s ok, I didn’t really get along with her, but I hope she’ll get better”
I looked at mom in the mirror and she glanced back at me.
“You boys ok?” She asked
Her words fell silent as I saw a helicopter pass by. I followed it and when it vanished in the distance I looked down. A large traffic jam was up ahead.
Mom sighed, “you kidding me, doesn’t anybody have work to go to?”
I heard beeping.
A lot of it
I felt a little uneasy
Like something wasn’t right
Like something was going to happen at any minute
You know that feeling?
I looked up once again and saw another helicopter and this time it had stopped not so far away from us.
“The hell is happening?” She asked, she got out of the car, “stay here guys”
I looked on as she got out. Other people came into view from the side of the car. Skateboarders and bicyclists along with pedestrians who checked their phones. I watched them all as they looked on at what was going on in front of us.
The door opened, “Mason,” I said, “What’re you’-
“I wanna see,” he told
Mom wasn’t there, so I decided to get out all so. I slowly got out and kept my gaze forward. The helicopter hovered not so far and the traffic had built up behind us. The line of cars was huge. A lot of beeping was happening.
“Can you see my mom?” I asked
“Yeah, she’s all the way over there,” he answered
“Bro, have you seen this?” Mason asked
“Look on your phone, check facebook”
I quickly got it out and got on to it. A live feed was shown and it was the exact same place where we were.
“You on it?” He asked
I looked on and focused. The live feed came from our friend from school, Devon. What it showed was a crash of four cars. They were all completely wrecked. The camera went closer into the gathering crowd and I suddenly heard his mom in the background.
“Devon, don’t get too close”
“Chill mom,” he told
“Everybody get back please,” a policeman said
Police cars and ambulances stood by close along with the fire service that helped out. Police stood round the sides whilst the paramedics and firemen and women dealt with the victims. It was horrible to watch. The victims were helped out of the wrecked cars slowly. They held their necks and legs as they cautiously carried them on to the stretchers that were close by. The camera zoomed in more on the action on one of the victims. She had a neck brace on. She was unconscious. They quickly moved the stretcher to the ambulance. Whilst the camera was focused on her a cry was heard.
The camera pulled back and I immediately saw a paramedic being bit by the man on the stretcher. Tensions began to rise and the situation grew stranger. A few of the victims were supposed to have been dead, but then…
“Get him off!” The paramedic cried
The camera showed the crowd begin to stir
“Devon, get back in the car!”
The camera then wobbled and it was taken off of him. The live feed then stopped. All that was seen and heard were the crowds and the commotion.
“That was some other type of crazy right there,” Mason spoke
“Something doesn’t feel right,” I said, “where’s mom, can you see her?”
“Yeah, she’s coming now”
A gun blast was then heard from the same place and the crowd began to lose it. People began to run in different directions and cars began to rush by.
Mom rushed back, “get in the car,” she told
What he said
What he told me
Weighed heavily on me and clasped everything in my head together and made it thump
I was worried for all of us
Having that burden on me was a lot. I didn’t want to tell anybody, because I knew if I did. They would’ve probably kicked him out and I didn’t want that weighing on me
Even though he didn’t ask me to keep it to myself. I still felt like he would’ve wanted me to do that.
“I should’nt have told you that,” he said, “I’m sorry, you’re just a kid, I can’t have that weighing on you”
I shook my head “No, no it doesn’t matter, it’s fine, I can handle it”
“It may not matter for you son, but it matters to me”
“I can take it, I’m fine”
“Maybe you’re, but that doesn’t give me the right to shoot you with it”
I got up and walked toward the door and stopped
“You were panicking in your sleep, was it about them?” I asked
“I’ve done some screwed up shit in my time kid, it could be any on of those, but it doesn’t concern you, I’ll deal with it”
I walked out and left him to it…