Survivors of the Z’s- Graham Jackson, Nottingham, UK
We were in the living room
And my angel
The same living room where I got humiliated in front of my family.
She looked at me.
I looked at her.
She stared me down and I looked away and put my hand into my palms. I got up and walked toward the window and gazed out of it and I could still feel her deadly stare.
“I know what you’re thinking, Evelyn,” I spoke
“Then why are you doing this?” She asked
“For Preston,” I told
“You could die,” she warned, “then what… huh?!”
I turned around and walked toward her.
“Keep your voice down”
“His brother took him, family took him, he’s with his family and that’s where he belongs,” she grabbed my hand, “you don’t need to do this”
I shook my head.
His older brother took him, yes.
His older brother took him in a direction where he could be killed at any moment?
My gut was telling me yes.
What I saw of him
What he did
What he’s been doing
Maybe killing innocent people
Coming into my fucking house and doing what the fuck he wants.
Anger burned deep down inside of me and the fire needed to be released and it was him I was going to release it on.
I had to. She might not have seen him as family, but I did. He was the son I never had and I was going to get him back and kick his brother into hell where he belonged.
“He was with us through so much, Evelyn,” I said, “he was like family”
“But he isn’t,” she repeated, “Why don’t you get that? We’re living in a time where family,” she put her hand to her chest and slapped it, “family, have to stick together and not seperate, do you understand? People are dying so fast and I don’t want you to be added to that list”
“I understand, I do and don’t ever think that I don’t,” I told, “I love you, I love Michelle and Katelyn, you’re my world”
“Then why do you want to leave us?” She asked
“I’m not leaving you, I’m getting something back that is a part of us, of all of us, he is family, he’s been with us and will continue to be with us”
Tears began to make her eyes sparkle and then they began to descend down her cheeks. She shook her head in disbelief. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing and a tiny part of me couldn’t believe it either, but it was something that just had to be done. I wouldn’t expect you to understand, but understand this. Would you rescue a boy who you loved, who you saw as a son, even though he wasn’t, but you still felt he was?
Her breath shuddered, “ok,” she said, “do what you want dad, do what the fuck you want, because it’s obvious that you’re only thinking about the things you want and not the things you need, and that thing is us and we… we need you”
She turned and walked away from me. Leaving me in a pool of her words circling my ears.
Then re- entering
Now the questions remained
Was she right?
And if she was right. Should I still go out there and save the boy?
I took time to think and I thought long and hard
I walked up the stairs and as I reached the top. I looked to my left and saw her sitting down next to the wall.
I began walking over to her, “what am I going to tell your granddaughters?”
I stopped in my tracks, it was like, she was stopping me from coming closer, “I have to get him back, I have to”
She looked up at me, “and if you don’t prevail, then what?”
“Thats not going to happen,” I told
She laughed and shook her head, “Mr macho man, Mr invincible”
“Don’t be like that”
“No dad, no,” she said, “I’m not the one who is blinde to danger, your the one who is being the fucking idiot in all of this”
I walked up to her and she got up and gazed my way, “please Evelyn”
“Stay the fuck away from me dad, if you wanna risk in killing yourself in saving something that isn’t ours, then go ahead, go right a fucking head”
She punched me and I staggered back, “Go fuck yourself”
She opened the door and closed it behind her.
“Mummy, what’s wrong?” I heard behind the door
“Nothing sweety, I’m here, go back to sleep”
And walked away
Bruno stayed close as we walked through the misty day.
I had made up my mind
It was the decision that was going to be the biggest risk of my life. It may have brought me to death’s door.
It may have brought me to saving the young lad who I now saw as a son.
I was coming for him with all my anger and all my might.
We reached the same place where I kicked the living crap out of Marcus. The same place that changed everything and brought me to this moment.
I looked at Bruno, “Here we’re,” I said, “you ready?” He looked at me, “Let’s go buddy”
We started walking over to the apartement block where huge familiar graffiti in black came visible at the corner.
The door had been left open. It was in tatters. Smashed to bits. I looked at the floor at the glass and watched Bruno walk around it and as we got in. I listened out for anybody that would be hanging around.
I then heard a crash and a cry upstairs.
Bruno then barked and pelted it upstairs which made me have no choice in doing the same.
“For fuck sake, Bruno”
I chased him up the next flight and watched him run through a door.
In an emotional turn
I heard Bruno yelp
“Bruno!” I cried
I ran through the same door toward him as he was laid out in the centre of the apartement. A scruffy skinny pale man who was busted up was standing up against the wall in fear.
I then looked around and realised why he was so fearful. A large man with a thick beard stood there with his eyes fixated on me. He held a large combat knife and walked toward me…